Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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