Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
My vagina just recognized that song.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
