We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
