Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
