I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
