I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
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