I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
He called his prostate his "boner button".
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
