just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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