Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling

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(207): View more from Maine

it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.

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(415): View more from California

Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling

(415): View more from California

God, I love San Francisco.

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(415): View more from California

From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...

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(314): View more from Missouri

I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.

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(970): View more from Colorado

But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"

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(309): View more from Illinois

My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.

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(252): View more from North Carolina

Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.

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