ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
