If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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