Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
