Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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