I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
