I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
this will be a night to untag.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
