sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
