Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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