Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
