I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
