Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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