I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I didn't notice because vodka
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
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