she was so not down for the gang bang
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You may now shotgun with the bride
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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