I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
