You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
