I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize