Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
