How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
