i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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