Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
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