i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
