We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
