If i come over, it means nothing
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
