we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
