Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
