areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I cannot find my penis.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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