Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
