I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
