C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
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