Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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