it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
