Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
