wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize