Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize