Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
