The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize