'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
She has the best kind of daddy issues
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
