my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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