i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
it glows. i had to have it.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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