I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
