don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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