You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
